kimberlysteele | The Ouija Board Syndrome and the Trouble with Mainstream Religion

I have always steered clear of Ouija boards out of instinctive horror. Though I have seen and conversed with full-body apparitions, had my share of astral travels gone wrong, and as the old fairy tale goes "lacked the ability to shudder", I have a loathing of Ouija boards that seems born of past life experiences. When I unpack the skeeviness of Ouija boards in discursive meditation, this is what I have come up with:

It's Not Just a Game

My first experience with a Ouija board was at age fifteen, when some friends and I gathered around at someone's house and had a go. Nothing happened. Nevertheless, though lumped in the same general BAD BAD BAD category as occult books and Tarot cards by Christian suburban Karen-moms, there was always something about Ouija that seemed far more off and and far less relative to the acquisition of knowledge. Ouija boards are often manufactured by Hasbro, the same outfit that puts out Nerf guns and My Little Pony. The idea of Hasbro making a tool that can easily devolve in allowing a demon to enter and potentially possess a random pre-teen is grotesque. I highly doubt anyone at Hasbro ever gave such a possibility a second thought, but that is what I believe Ouija boards do: they quickly devolve from party game to demonic portal in a way an occult book or deck of Tarot cards will never emulate.

The reason why this happens is a sort of Lowest Common Denominator effect that happens at parties. Hoping for the best -- usually romance, fun, or exhiliration -- brings out the worst, especially in teenagers who are already dramatic by nature. Once it is tacitly understood that the party is not going to be a positive revolution that changes her life for the better, the excitement of the party turns into a vicious ennui for some guests, and that's where the Ouija board comes in as a desperate attempt to "make something happen".

A similar phenomenon happens during seances, where a crowd lathers itself up in anticipation of a life-changing experience. Most people go to seances hoping for a connection with a dead loved one. This can happen either with or without the possession of a medium.

No banishing rituals are done before or after a Ouija session or a seance. Considering the popularity of Ouija and seances over the last 200 years, it is no wonder the collective astral is so grubby. A channelling of random spirits without a banishing ritual both before and after is like going into surgery after a week without washing your hands. Septic is a nice word for it. At this very moment, some doofuses are having a seance somewhere, opening a floodgate of demonic energy into our already demon-infested plane. Somewhere else, a bunch of would be edgelord teenagers are doing the same thing with a Ouija board.

Take Me to Church... JK, Actually, Please Don't

I have yet to walk out of a church, temple, or religious center feeling cleaner than I did before I entered. Before I could talk to spirits, I could not explain why I routinely felt this way, so hopefully now that I've had some quality conversations with non-corporeal beings, I can give it a better shot. Like Ouija sessions and seances, the magical work of channeling spirits (thought to be God) is only as good as its weakest link. From what I have noticed, there are plenty of good souls in the pew seats and at the folding tables at any given service, but what tends to happen is a sort of drag effect from both mentally disturbed people among the worshippers as well as massive problems caused by the hypocrisy of the chosen leader/leaders.

When I have been in Christian churches, there is often the feeling of a fledgling attempting to rise against a strong wind and being blown back to the ground by a gust of crass materialism that makes a mockery of any honest aspiration or spiritual work. Among Buddhists, I could feel the spirits of place desperately vying for my energy and attention, begging me to come back to try and see the beauty they had cultivated. Alas, the leaden virtue signaling and status obsession of the center's leaders was not a force to be overcome by me or anyone else, and I explained this to the gentle spirit who pleaded with me to give it a second chance. In Hindu temples, I was fatigued by the insistence on empty-mind meditation as a panacea when this is not and has never been the case, at least not for me personally.
What I see happening in all of these places is similar to the Ouija Board Syndrome: a septic floodgate is opened by the naive who always presume they are channeling exactly whom they think they are channeling, as if demons were not good liars.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

mr_nobody1967

Every anecdote I have ever heard about something happening when people use Ouija Boards has been negative, and I am sure nearly everybody who reads this post will be able to say the same thing.

From:

kimberlysteele

It seems to me the best outcome with a Ouija board is for nothing to happen at all. The same is true of a seance -- it's amazing how people can fool themselves about talking to some dead famous person or a missing/deceased relative when it's so clearly and obviously a demon.

From:

methylethyl

Had exactly one time, where a friend dug one of those out of a closet (belonged to a stepsibling or something) and had a go at it, because boredom. Not a party or anything, more just curiosity. Absolutely nothing happened, but we put it away after about 1 minute-- I was overwhelmed with bad feeling about it. Not sure I even knew what it was at that age, or what the implications were. Just seemed like a really terrible idea and NOPE NOPE NOPE.

From:

kimberlysteele

Good for you! I always had the same feeling about them. It's no coincidence they tend to be unearthed from the closet or whatever at 3am, which is the worst hour of the night/morning, in my opinion.

From:

methylethyl

Yeah, honestly glad it wasn't 3am-- middle of the afternoon IIRC (but considering nothing of note happened, and I was like 9 maybe, it's funny that I remember it so clearly), but I was tagging along on her mandatory weekend visit with her divorced dad, so already a mite uncomfortable off the familiar home turf. She wanted to keep going, I balked, she was a good enough friend to not push it. But I remember still being a bit freaked out by it hours later after I'd gone home, much like you'd feel after... I dunno. A really close call with a swerving 18-wheeler on a wet interstate maybe. Guardian angel putting in overtime, I guess.

From:

kimberlysteele

We must be sisters from a different mister, because those were my exact thoughts -- that something watching over me put a stop to any shenanigans brought on by a close encounter with a Ouija board.

From:

methylethyl

It's good to have (invisible) friends ;)

From:

kimberlysteele

Yes! As it turns out, being able to "see" them is overrated!

From: (Anonymous)

Ouija boards have always creeped me out for some reason; I got plenty of scare stories about The Occult as a kid in Christian day school, but that was the only one that stuck. Makes sense now!

--Sister Crow

From:

kimberlysteele

Sadly, Christians tend to throw the baby out with the bathwater on frequent occasion. Here's a good example -- a Catholic exorcist who condemns Eliphas Levi because he has failed to meditate on what the image of Baphomet means: https://www.catholicexorcism.org/post/exorcist-diary-135-a-prince-of-hell-on-fire

That said, yes, sometimes scary stories are there for reasons other than ways of getting attention around the campfire!

From:

lp9

I remember the Ouija board coming out at slumber parties but thankfully nothing ever happened. We also played Stiff As A Board, Light As A Feather at those same parties and for some reason I was always the one tasked with sitting at the person's head, rubbing their temples, and telling the story of how they died (Good imagination/storyteller? I was also the one chosen to "read palms" and tell fortunes). Creeps me out now that I think back on it!

From:

kimberlysteele

That's so funny! I guess they pegged you as the natural mystic early on!

From: (Anonymous)

Thanks for this, Kimberly. I very much agree, these things are a very, very bad idea for kids, or for anyone, to play with. When I was a kid I thought people who objected were superstititious sillies (and as you amusingly put it, they were oftentimes those "Christian Karen moms"). But now that I am older and a little wiser, no way I would tangle with one of these things. I wouldn't let it into my house.

Self-described Psychic Medium

From:

kimberlysteele

I would not let any kid under the age of fifteen use a Ouija board. If it was my (non-existent) kid, I would hope they would understand when I explained the reason I don't allow him or her use Ouija boards is the same reason I keep him or her out of church and why we don't have a television: astral hygiene.

For the record, I think it would be fine to use a Ouija board solo as an adult if you were experienced with invoking deities while banishing and did a banishing ritual both before and after. Used with banishing, it's just another way of divination if you go in with intention to communicate with the gods. Not my preferred way, but I believe Ouija could be used safely.

The problem introduces itself when any group of people attempts a channeling ritual -- Ouija, seance, worship service -- with no banishing rituals and Lowest Common Denominator in the form of massive hypocrites, materialists, and narcissists sitting alongside the earnest seekers.

Yes, my hypothesis supposes there are millions if not billions of churches, temples, and mosques channeling demons right now because of what has happened to most mainstream religions in our materialist age: the majority no longer know how to ceremonially invoke gods. So yes, I am saying that the woke Methodist church in my parents' rich neighborhood and the rabidly anti-abortion McBox church (that ironically provides no shelter for homeless single mothers) channels demons every Sunday on the regular, and there isn't diddly squat anyone can do about it.

From:

kimberlysteele

Also, just going to put this out there that my hypothesis would explain a great deal of the sexual scandals that plague organized religions. We have a bunch of blind idiots opening doors to just about everything the astral plane has to offer once or twice a week, and none of the antique skills it takes to bounce the intruders, thieves, pedos, and rapists from the house.

From:

kimberlysteele

My hypothesis may also explain why Greek Orthodox and traditional Catholic churches (the ones doing the old Mass) withstood quaxx pressures better than any other church and featured the most people willing to speak out against the quaxx. Because they do older versions of Christian rituals well-established in their effectiveness, they are the only ones with any protection from God remaining, and it is entirely possible that their God came to their assistance when it was time to be brave. That said, there are a handful of Protestant churches that stood against the quaxx in my area of northeastern Illinois, mostly in the far, far West suburbs outside the Metra train line.

From:

methylethyl

I wish I could say we (orthodox) did a good job of withstanding it, but our churches were shut down doing online-only services at the beginning, too, along with at least token temp-checks, sanitizer, and masks at the door for a while. It's not exactly a badge of honor that we opened up a bit before some of the other churches :/ There was some pushback, not nearly enough IMO, though perhaps that is an issue of my discernment-- I'm all for stepping up, taking the heat, and leading by example but it's possible that the time wasn't ripe for it, that'll come later, and our bishops rightly chose discretion. But it could've just been cowardice. It is what it is, and I *hope* we've learned enough not to fall for it, in whatever form it takes, in the next round. I am confident there will be a next round.

That said, I'm optimistic about the near future, because the last two years have seen a crazy influx of converts, mostly from more mainline churches, and I think even if the oldtimers didn't quite understand the significance of the shutdowns, the new people are very clear on it.

We're not free of corruption, either, our scandals are just *different* from the Catholics' and protestants'-- still human, after all ;)

From:

emmanuelg

This does make sense of a lot of my experiences--
My Dad brought home a ouija board, and in one session, one of my younger brothers was convinced he was the reincarnation of a dead nazi soldier-- And was a racist jerk for years after.
JMG has commented elsewhere about modern pastors not having a clue about the need for distributing the spiritual energy of a Sunday worship for the good of the community. I had not thought about the dangers stemming from no banishings, but that matches my experience as well.

At one time, I was appointed to the Board of Deacons and had to take a multiweek sunday school class about it. It quickly became obvious that the elders and pastor who taught the class had no spiritual life, and no concept of the reality of God (let alone any concept of other gods).--

And this is perhaps why they were always out to disband the home group where we met weekly for dinner and worship. We were always coming up with projects to help our neighbors and grow the community part of the community of faith, but always getting blocked from the pastor's office.

Years later, what a surprise it was to feel, after the banishing ritual described in Dion Fortune's book on spiritual self defense, cleansed and refreshed!

From:

kimberlysteele

He brought home a Ouija board and then involved the kids? Sheesh.

Of course I could be wrong, but from my understanding, good intentions can only go so far. There has to be at least one traditional prayer, song, chant, to act as mooring for any given church service, or it goes to hell fast, and even with traditional elements functioning in the way a banishing ritual does, the quality of energy channeled is still only as good as the Lowest Common Denominator.

Le sigh, yes, I have run into plenty of church elders who had no business claiming any sort of expertise when it came to living a spiritual life, but since I was 100% ignorant of that stuff, I just took their word for it that they knew what they were talking about. We see this sort of thing a great deal in medicine, where medical professionals convince themselves their degree means they know how to heal someone when the only things they actually know how to do are to follow orders, kiss ass, and suck up grift money.

From: (Anonymous)

In the churches I grew up in, the main criteria for being an Elder seemed to be 1) Age, and 2) Wealth.

From:

kimberlysteele

Yep. One of the primary problems of the Good Old Days was that reaching a certain age meant you got respect no matter what.

From:

lukedodson

This is probably the best outcome for most ouija sessions:

From:

kimberlysteele

Perfect!

From:

lukedodson

Also, entirely off-topic, but as you're a Chicago-resident, I thought I'd share the footage of this magnificent Chonkasaurus narrated by Chicago's answer to David Attenborough: https://twitter.com/JoeySantore/status/1654856551159455744

Long live the Chicago turtles and their hilarious narrators!

From:

kimberlysteele

So funny! Chonkasaurus truly is magnificent. And yes, those Chicago accents are about as authentic as it gets...

From: (Anonymous)

I've been trying to sort some of my more supernatural occult experiences which occured before the aage of 14 or so. I was the virgin at more than one seance, for example, and thus I was the one who was put in the position to be the medium. I don't know what I said but I know one of my friends was positive that she was talking to her grandmother through me.
I liken the experience to your soul must be absolutely clean as glass. Maybe shit gets poured into it, maybe cranberry wine, maybe just some milk. But how do you get the residue off afterwards? And does anyone want to drink from a glass that had shit in it no matter how hard you clean it afterwards?
Ouija boards are likewise more dangerous thana they say. I know of one that spontaneously caught on fire and during a rowdy session a beer bottle launched off the table at my head and shattered on the back wall. It's some weird stuff which is treated like no big deal at all...

From:

kimberlysteele

Though your friend may have talked to her grandmother through you (anything is possible) it was most likely an impersonator, one of the many spirits -- not necessarily demonic -- that enjoys masquerading as the ghost of a human. The impersonator feeds and draws from the consciousness on the person who wants to make contact. Sometimes they get it right, sometimes they don't. It's a great deal like AI technology: the impersonator scans your thoughts for correlations floating in your brain in order to string them together and make a facsimile of dear old grandma. More often than not, they fail because there is no real understanding or cognition of who grandma is/was. Impersonators often turn menacing as they realize the gig is up and the glamour is falling away. If the session had lasted a while longer, you likely would have seen it turn septic with "grandma" becoming menacing or nasty.

It sounds like you have natural sensitivity and mediumistic talent. This certainly can be useful in spiritual practice, but of course I would NOT recommend Ouija boards/seances. I recommend opening a dialogue with your spiritual ecosystem with the help of discursive meditation and/or a daily banishing ritual such as the Sphere of Protection or the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram. Here is a video where I demonstrate how to do the aforementioned daily banishing ritual: https://www.youtube.com/embed/dsD3LkfgFVs?si=-osmnRrcyJQ1gWLj