kimberlysteele | Block Party

Dear Friend,

There are reasons why I have blocked you out of my life. Right now, I am facing the consequences of your actions. Your paranoia about a disease that has been statistically proven to kill fewer people than heart disease per year has nearly destroyed my business that is twenty-four years in the making. That’s more than half my life. You, who attained higher degrees at great cost yet have not been able to do what I managed out of determination, originality, and sheer chutzpah now sit back, demanding the eternal shutdown so you and your loved ones can obtain the communist welfare utopia you think you want.

I did my best to keep my irritation at bay, but when your derangement over a legally-elected president exploded into its latest virulent form, I had no choice but to bring down the hammer of judgement. You are, quite literally, ruining my life right now. Like many Americans, I was just beginning to see a bit of financial prosperity when you cut the economy’s legs off with shutdowns and then riots.

To understand how we got here, I want to go on a journey into your psychology, a thing that you have almost no understanding of despite your general pretenses of being book-smart and expensive psychotherapist addiction.

Once upon a time, there was a senator from Vermont who rose to recognition on waves of the middle class economic frustration. He was axed in a tragicomedy of high-grade corruption so obvious a third grader could have figured out the storyline. The result of this cheating was the election of a charismatic Caesar, which if you knew anything of history, you would know is a common event during the decline of Empire. If you weren’t so mentally damaged, you might also know this outcome is better for you and the class to which you aspire than the alternative, which is mass bloodshed and beheadings of a fossilized elite a la Robespierre.

You operate exactly like a person under a malign spell. You still have not gotten over the results of an election nearly four years in the past. Please let that sink in. There has been plenty of time to sit back and reflect why your party lost and even more time to cultivate ways to do better by potential voters. Instead of doing this, you have thrown a multi-year tantrum that began with lumpy pink hats. The excuse at that time was sexual harassment of girls and women. Part of the first #metoo phase was to pretend you are a witch and throw bad intentions at the alleged misogynist patriarchy; this summed up the zeitgeist adequately. Your karmic punishment for these bad intentions is a blubbering, senile pedophile you’ve cruelly thrust into the debate chair.

The next phase of manufactured outrage was Russian collusion. Projecting your own shadow, you cried about espionage and electronic manipulation. Boy, did you get your rear end handed to you on that one.

After that, it was masks. You’re still in this phase. The mask is at once a virtue signal and the grown-up’s version of a binky: a sad, dilapidated totem that symbolically shields its wearer from being perceived as politically conservative. That’s why you want everyone to wear the mask; just like you would like us to believe there are more than twenty people who want to vote for your demented presidential candidate, you want to enforce the appearance of political hegemony among people who have no interest in backing your party. Holding the entire economy hostage isn’t enough. Having the entire mainstream media in your pocket isn’t enough. Since cable viewership is down, you have discovered you cannot force your way into the public consciousness via the television screen and its ads. Only a person under an evil spell would be horrified by this, and horrified you are. You would have George Orwell’s 1984 without envisioning the consequences, and because you are deeply afflicted, you have bankrupted yourself intellectually out of lust of result.

Like the aforementioned French 18th century elite, you are losing your heads due to an acute lack of self-analysis.

Your final, desperate act is to play the race card. To do this, you have enlisted an infantry of white, college-educated liberal women and their pathetic, ineffectual male cuckolds. Behind them, yanking the puppet strings, are viciously racist blacks, Latinos, and Asians, cheering on the disintegration of the working classes as business districts are torched. Like you, the riots are motivated by a fundamental disconnect from reality. Large corporations that benefit from times of unrest are unscathed when one or two of their stores are burned to the ground; small businesses are not. You bleat about systemic cruelty, yet wasn’t it you I saw on Instagram modeling stretch pants or fashionable new Amazon.com outfit/toy? Wasn’t your new item made via slave labor in the Third World? You live in a segregated neighborhood, whether it is all white and Asian, all black, or all Latino. I don’t. My lower middle class neighborhood is mixed, just like my own racial make-up. You are voting for the party that put more blacks in jail than any other party, yet this is somehow about police cruelty, not the institutions that control the levers of law enforcement. Once again, you piss on my leg and tell me it’s raining.

I have blocked you because you are no longer sane. I hope this is a temporary condition, but I have no problem if it is permanent. You need me more than I need you. You need businesses like mine so the economy isn’t completely given over to the large corporations you claim to be taking to task. You need my mental stability and my willingness to stand against tyrants. “By their fruits ye shall know them.” You, who say you are brave, manifest the opposite of bravery in every deed and word. You have thrown me under the bus, and in doing so, you have become the despised tyrant. You are not the victim. You are the perpetrator. This time, it's personal. Sayonara.

Current Mood: grumpy

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Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

violetcabra

Hear hear! I certainly can relate to this, and I'm so sorry to read of the damage done to your business! I've been watching in horror as the left goes further and further off the deep end, into utter psychosis. Perhaps this is simply wishful thinking on my end, but I really think that when the rubble stops bouncing and the smoke clears there may well be a lot more opportunities. Still getting to that point might be a long road.

One thing that gives me some hope is that more and more people seem to be "walking away" and that might lead to some degree of political rebalancing if Trump wins and republicans gain control of congress. Of course, it may not be perfect and may be dreadful, but if it were to pass -- which seems increasingly likely -- at least some semblance of sanity might be regained.

From:

kimberlysteele

I'm with you... I see it all coming to a head. Meanwhile, I'm hanging in there. It may be pure personal failing on my part, but as long as my leftist acquaintances maintain two paradigms, that of nothingburger flu paranoia and of BLM race baiting, they will remain acquaintances, not friends. I think more and more people are walking away as well. I have made the decision to delete my Facebook account once the moon is almost entirely waned in July. Facebook is absolutely a cesspit and I no longer want any part of it, nor do I want the Zuckerteam spying on me.

From: (Anonymous)

Excellent post Kimberley, I came to your blog via an archdruid

From:

dopplerampm

I have enjoyed reading your work for as long as I can remember; at least 2006 or so. I was really disappointed to hear about your struggles and that you were deleting your Facebook. Your post prompted me to drop you this message. I hope you don't think other people aren't following and appreciating the work you do during this time of crises. I prefer when you blog about yourself, btw, especially your younger years growing up in the burbs. You're so interesting, and I love 1970s-1990s west Chicagoland stuff.

From: (Anonymous)

I am visiting from the Archdruid's site.

Respect. Your take on mask wearing throws some clarity into my bewilderment. Generally, I find it an thoughtful rant.

I today witnessed my boomer-age boss who is entirely plugged into the superiority-validating NYT/New Yorker feeding tubes talking to city hall to tell them that from his office window he sees people without masks walking into the local stores and that they have to provide leadership because the governor says...

I felt a queasiness in the gut. a revulsion. A strong desire to leave the place and not look back.

The insistence to mask has not felt right to me. It feels Taliban-like. I think your take on it being an anti-trump act that gives a feeling of reinforced numbers - as if they make non-democrats into Biden-loving Democrats - is part of what I observe. But there is more behind it than that, I perceive. I just can't quite see it clearly.

Can part of it be the perennial tyranny of the old against the young? More despoiling by boomers after a lifetime of practice, in order to indelibly leave behind a scorched earth? A projecting outward, into society, of one's failures? The violent realization of impending mortality by a selfish generation who thought they were special -plus immortal, and if everyone wears masks, they get to avoid fate?

Grrrr. I so am exhausted today of irrational people driven by herd fear.

Anyway. . . again, kudos on the above. I'll peruse your other written sharings.

Cheers from Washington State.

From: (Anonymous)

Very well done. I have to second the bit about facebook and social media. They are poison. It is known that facebook and google research and use mind control methods. Hanging out on facebook and social media is to give them your mind for their experiments.

From: (Anonymous)

yay! thank you!
x

From:

kimberlysteele

Aww, thanks! Did I even have a book in 2006? I may end up just deleting most of my Facebook friends and groups. Unfortunately, deleting the whole thing doesn't get rid of it, it just makes it so I no longer have access to the information.

From:

kimberlysteele

Thank you.

From:

kimberlysteele

You're welcome.

From:

kimberlysteele

Wow, what a great comment! Much to meditate on, especially this idea of the tyranny of the old against the young and scorched earth. In my Corona, Mon Amour post, I touched on the idea of fear of death driving the whole freakout. Boomers know they've created an "arrangement without a future" in the words of James Howard Kunstler, and instead of accepting the Long Descent they've made into history's idiot bin, they've tried to obfuscate their role in the decline by creating a DIY flupocalypse.

From:

joshuarout

Dear Kimberly,

Excellent post! I saw on J.M. Greer's Open Post that you were interested in advice about dealing with anger, so for what it's worth, I thought I'd share the methods I used in successfully overcoming my chronic anger. Franz Bardon's Initiation Into Hermetics starts the student off by constructing what he calls the 'Soul Mirror.' The Soul Mirror is a catalogue of one's positive and negative qualities, traits, or emotions. These traits are then categorized according to the Four Classical Elements as primarily Fire (Hot and Dry), Earth (Cold and Dry), Water (Cold and Wet), or Air (Hot and Wet). One can then see in the Soul Mirror what elemental imbalances one has, and work on achieving an elemental equilibrium. The immediate usefulness of this model comes in the next step, that of transformation. One can now create a strategy based on the elemental nature of the trait - in this case, anger.
Using the Alchemical (or Elemental) Square of Opposition, one can outline the transformation process in the following manner. Let's say the anger's elemental quality is Fire - hot and dry. Its opposite would be positive Water qualities - cold and moist. One can see from the Elemental Square of Opposition, however, that it would be difficult to go directly from Fire to Water - one must go through either the Air traits (hot and moist) or the Earth traits (cold and dry) first, to reach Water.
In my case, I chose to go through positive Air qualities - communication (writing, verbalizing), analysis, understanding, clarity, optimism, joy. Repeatedly writing down the thinking associated with the anger, analyzing it objectively, and uncovering its deepest roots; and also deliberately writing down things to be optimistic and joyful about. Throughout this time, I used Bardon's recommended techniques of 1) affirmations, 2) charging water and food with the desired trait (the food is then consumed and the quality absorbed), and 3) sessions of charging the air with the desired quality (which is then breathed in).
An additional technique I used is the Stoic form of mindfulness - being aware of the 'locus of control': is the cause of this emotion up to me, within my control? Or not up to me, beyond my control? So throughout the day, every day, whenever the anger arose, I recorded in a chart the Time, the Thought, the Emotion, the Action, the Locus of control (is it up to me?), the elemental quality (negative Fire), and the replacement elemental quality I was cultivating (positive Air or, later, positive Water). By monitoring the thoughts associated with the emotion, I was able to notice repeating thought-habits, and whenever they arose, to more easily let go of concerns for things beyond my control.
After successfully shifting the energies of the anger to Air, I then began to cultivate positive Water qualities - forgiveness, compassion, gratitude, etc., using the same methods. By ultimately replacing the negative Fire trait with positive Water traits, I could ensure a more permanent neutralization of the source of the anger. With time, these cultivated traits became permanent habits - just as the anger was a habit.
An additional benefit of working with one's traits and emotions as manifestations of the Elements within oneself is that it fits very well other disciplines that use the Four Elements, such as geomancy, astrology, and many types of magic.
I hope you find this helpful!
Regards,
Josh Rout

From:

kimberlysteele

Thanks. My latest interchange on Facebook, with a person I will call AWFL whom I have recently blocked. The post was about acknowledging that Irish people were also enslaved during the same time period as Africans:

AWFL: To me this post in this context says “Hey look over here! [waving hands] Don’t look deeper at anti-black American history”
Not same but similar to “go away vegans no one cares. xyz bad thing is also important. so I will distract and change the topic from animals to xyz”
The point made at the end of this video made me think of this post and the subsequent comments on your thread.
David Ikard in response to being asked by a white author what to do about the author’s indiscretions:
“There was a time in which if you were Jewish you were not white. If you were Italian you were not white. If you were Irish you were not white in this country. It took a while before the Irish, the Jews, and the Italians became white, right? There was a time in which you were othered, when you were the people on the outside.
Toni Morrison said ‘If in order for you to feel taller I need to be in my knees, you have a serious problem’. She says ‘White America has a serious, serious problem’.”

(link to Ted Talk)

ME: You mean well, AWFL, but in my opinion you are pandering out of deep fear of the race you claim to be helping. I know you are married to a non-white person. You could be married to a black person and this sort of virtue signaling would still ring hollow. How dare white people presume the lived experience of any non-white person? Where do you guys get the nerve? And as for blacks, once again they are being used and abused for liberal policymaking that has never once helped them. I am half-white, making me as white as Barack Obama, and I resent this transparent form of pandering for political advantage. The Left has become a hammer and all it sees are nails. This seems to me and plenty of others like a final, desperate grab at thought policing via white guilt. Couldn't topple Orange Julius populism with the Me Too movement, so then it was off to Russian collusion. That failed, so now it's mandatory masks, toppled statues, and riots. Now you want civil war in order to forcibly install your way of thinking. That's what it looks like from my view, and I'm not alone.

I sense you are in a bad place and I don't envy your karma. I hope that you become more reflective and I will try to do the same. Be blessed.

From:

lincoln_lynx

In times of chaos and disruption people try to re-establish some sense of order and control over their own and other's lives in a futile attempt at again feeling secure.

From:

kimberlysteele

Fascinating, Josh, just fascinating. I did a series of meditations on the elements about two years ago. I didn't realize you could apply the knowledge like that. How cool. I think it could also be useful for figuring out my past lives. I am aware that much of my anger does not come from this lifetime.

From: (Anonymous)

Yet I'm so sorry to hear what has happened to your business and hope the hysteria will pass and you can recover. The resilience of small business is the hope of the future.

It is good that you can get this off your chest. We all have crises and I am very grateful to the people who responded and listened to me when I had mine earlier this year.

I do my best thinking when I get out to nature. Are you able to get out to nature, or are they still blocking that where you are? I think part of the reason the insanity has gone through the roof is that people have been cooped up on an unnatural environment for too long.
Stay safe! I enjoy your comments over on JGM's blog.

Pat

From: (Anonymous)

Last time I commented I mentioned the anti Trump witches and their workings against him. They are experiencing panic attacks and are homebound.

They are also shrinking their world into a precious few. I escape censure since I discuss squirrels and the squirrel planet and Admiral Nut. They think I am crazy. I am sane.

I do believe that they had hidden mental illness that Trump triggered. After that, the entities that feed off anger and rage went to town. They opened the gate, and in the entities came. Now, for mental hygiene, separation from them is critical.

Meanwhile, the squirrels provide spiritual support for me. I do believe i was one in a part life.

Neptune's Dolphins.

From: (Anonymous)

I doubt this will be allowed to appear, but you need to understand that COVID is dangerous - not because of the sheer number of people it will kill, but because some people are affected in such a way that they require ventilators to survive, and the number of ventilators in hospitals are limited. And there's no way to tell who will be affected severely and who won't until it actually happens. There's an antibiotic called chloramphenicol which is banned for use in humans because - for some people - it causes their bone marrow to shut down. The vast majority aren't affected like this, but for those who are, it's devastating. That's why it's banned. That's why many places are taking precautions against COVID, requiring masks and social distancing - it's because we can't predict who will require intensive care to survive it, and our ability to provide that care is limited.

From:

joshuarout

Great! It's a lot of work, but I think it's worthwhile. The Sphere of Protection is a natural application - when calling on the Elements, the awareness of them manifesting within oneself as traits or qualities is helpful, as is awareness of the Elemental nature of traits or qualities when banishing or invoking them. You're right about past lives, too! The effort to work on myself using these methods cleared the way for my first such recollection. Without that first housecleaning, it would probably have been a subject merely for 'astral tourism,' of no real use - or I might have been beset by doubts. Instead it was clear and certain, and like the lifting of a great burden, when I could see that certain traits were simply things I had clung to from another life, and I could quietly let go of anything that wasn't useful or necessary.
It's instructive to compare the traditional Theravada Buddhist methods taught to monks for recalling past lives - for example, after achieving and coming out of the meditative state of the first jhana (or some state close to it, according to Ajahn Brahm), the mind is clear and exceptionally focused, and one instructs the mind to recall its earliest memory, then waits quietly and without expectation. When that memory has arises, one then proceeds further and further back, until eventually one reaches what are clearly memories of another life. But such a meditative state of the required depth can only be attained after a certain amount of letting go, tranquility, and inner equilibrium have already been accomplished. The use of Elements to understand and balance one's traits and emotions is just another method to accomplish much the same thing. (Interestingly, meditation/concentration on the Elements is another practice from Theravada Buddhist tradition - part of the kasinas.)

From:

kimberlysteele

The vast majority of people driving in automobiles won't be involved in deadly or disfiguring collisions. Why are we allowing people to drive? Somebody was decapitated on the corner of the block where I grew up in a car accident. Car accidents have nearly killed my family members. Personally, I hate driving and I am taking steps to eventually cut it out of my life because I know the risks. Yet I don't want to shut down the roads in a heavy-handed, totalitarian "MY WORD IS LAW" move. The combination of hydroquinone and zinc was shown to fight off COVID and/or cure bad cases of it, no bone marrow issues. Actually, simple zinc supplement lozenges, used after eating meals 2x a day, have a remarkable track record in avoiding or shortening flus.

Trump derangement syndrome stopped an effective treatment from being rolled out: instead, you guys decided that it was time to sacrifice small business owners in order to try and game an election you most likely cannot win even by cheating. If your agenda wasn't so laughably transparent, maybe we'd be able to believe you had everyone's health interests in mind.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=381830819375011

From:

kimberlysteele

Franz Bardon is obviously a must-read author. Thanks for leading me to him. One of my past lives has been easier to access than some of the others: it was that of Robert, who was a traveling musician/jester/troubadour guy who ended up hanging on the gallows for impregnating the burgomaster's daughter (or wife, I'm not sure of that detail). From him I get a huge amount of frustration with Christianity. In a different life than Robert's, I am also pretty sure I starved to death, and I believe I may have starved to death at age 12. For this reason, I tend to have an enormous amount of self-control where food is concerned: I never want to eat too much or too little. I can go without food and not complain, but I also have no urge to compulsively overeat, as all that does in a time of starvation is to make deprivation feel like the end of the world.

From:

causticus

Great read; thank you so much for sharing your vivid experiences on this. I've also been struggling to keep my anger in check as the situation continues to devolve and become more clownish by the day.

The number of people in my local area I've considered to be friends has dwindled down to a tiny number over the past 5 years. I stopped posting status updates to evil FB about two years ago, as my feed had become a leftist sewage stream; I felt like I was basically now behind enemy lines. Most my friends now are online-only and they're people who also wholly reject anything "woke" or approximate to it.

BTW, I'm a big fan of your Orphic Hymns work (as someone who has been trying to keep a daily practice reciting them) and I appreciate the many insightful comments you leave on JMG's blogs.

From:

kimberlysteele

True 'nuff. I would have no problem if they were simply exerting control over their own lives by personally staying home. My problem with them begins when they try to control what I do and shut down my business.

From:

kimberlysteele

Thank you. I mentioned to Violet and I think we are in agreement that things might blow over a bit after the election. I'm grateful to get it off my chest too. It has given me lots of opportunities to process the anger I am feeling in a more positive way than before. I've been going to the forest preserves frequently. I agree with you that it is the key to sanity.

From:

joshuarout

Those sound like excellent past life insights! And useful - maybe that's why J.M. Greer always says 'let them surface when they're ready to surface.'
Self-control with eating sounds like an beneficial trait to have :)
I'm now subscribed to your blog, looking forward to future posts!