kimberlysteele: (Default)
[personal profile] kimberlysteele
Irreconcilable differences are the primary reason cited when two people divorce. The designation is amorphous and vague. She cheated? Irreconcilable differences. He is a raging alcoholic? Irreconcilable differences. Her nagging got tiresome, and her body was no longer desirable? Same. He left his dirty socks on the floor in front of the hamper? Good enough -- now let's get the ink on those papers so we can break up your family and devastate your children.

I have a bad habit of watching Facebook reels, and like Instagram and TikTok, the reels tailor themselves to what they believe you'll watch. Underneath them, however, there is a discreet agenda for those willing to look. Facebook would like me to end my marriage. It would like to see my 26 year commitment in tatters and shreds so statists and their cronies can milk me for whatever assets I managed to accumulate, including the etheric energy or loosh I have saved up in my middle aged body. It would like to see me dependent on the teat of the algorithm, continually seeking it out for the next dopamine hit. It would like me to be informed by it and to act according to its will.

Facebook knows its target demographic is middle-aged women and it wants us to blow up our marriages and lives so we can be cast adrift in hostile waters. The more violent and petty our divorces, the better. Facebook has a voracious appetite for drama, and there is a wealth of divorced or soon-to-be-divorced women on it complaining about the awfulness of men. The other social media platforms are the same.

Facebook isn't so bald and out in the open about trying to brainwash me. Mostly, it shows me innocuous videos of women improving their own homes. They restore furniture (furniture restoration videos were what hooked me in the first place as I like to re-work and repurpose old things) and they put up molding and wallpaper without help from men. There is one lady who has re-done her entire house. She has done much of the labor while heavily pregnant. We never see her husband in the shots, and the one time we did, she openly shamed him for doing a bad job framing a wall. This brief humiliation ritual seemed to say "men are vestigial and useless except as sperm donors". Mind you, she was not much to look at in body or face, and as much as I tried not to judge her, I did make the assessment that she was well on the road to divorce. The more famous she got on the social media machine with her pretty pictures of cleverly decoupaged kid's furniture, the further she got away from the notion that men have value. Her house is beautiful but I do pity her children.

The agenda behind the superwomen who can frame a wall, find a dresser on the roadside and spiff it up and sell it for $850, and rake in more than their ex or soon-to-be ex-husbands make on social media from sponsors is to make more divorced women and men. More divorced women means more households as families atomize, liquidating generational real estate to scatter to apartments or the more ideal purchase of a "me and my kids only" home for the new set of fragmented people. More divorced women means tremendous bonuses for family counselors, therapists, and other know-nothing shills who profiteer off of emotional pain and suffering while also acting as direct and indirect drug pushers for Big Pharma. But most of all, more divorced women free up the ultimate resource and money maker: the children of divorce. The System survives off the energy of children, and that is why it wants them to be abandoned, thrown into foster care, and pre-digested in the juices of hatred and discord. The formidable wall of loving, intact husband and wife must be at least partially demolished so the children can be vampirized by the Epsteins and Diddys of the world and their copious followers. Divorce makes it far, far easier to get at those precious children, and it is the perfect tool for distracting the parents and literally removing the kids from their sight.

My husband, the child of divorce, spent the first 11 years of his life in the most sheltered of Christian fundamentalist environments. He was not allowed to watch television other than Flipper or Animal Kingdom. There were no sleepovers. When he hit 12, three years before he would truly go through puberty, his parents began the excruciating process of a long and drawn out divorce. Overnight, he was left almost entirely to his own devices as his father ran off to live with the woman he had been cheating with and his mother scrambled to get a job after being a housewife her entire adult life. My future husband, then an adolescent, started smoking that year and did not quit until he was in his 40s and married to me. He began drinking an entire case of Coca Cola every day as if it was water. He got in such bad trouble at church school for scrapping and falling asleep in class, he was sent to a religious boarding school in a nearby state which utterly failed to put him on the straight and narrow. Just imagine how his teenage years would have gone if he came up in the age of online porn.

Divorce opens the floodgates so the vampires can eat the children, and often they have been grooming the children and both parents for a long time before the ink is on the divorce papers. For instance, the videos of the women doing all of the "manly" construction tasks all by themselves are a form of grooming. They quietly say to the women that we can have the prettiest and most peaceful of homes as soon as men are out of the picture, either subjugated and dismissed by being forced to live in a sea of Laura Ashley-esque chintz, brass bath caddies, and wall-to-wall sage green paneling or foisted out of the home altogether with a suitcase and a footprint on their rear end next to the welt where the door hit them on the way out.

The self-satisfied divorcee can then engage in the fragile virtue signaling of somehow making a living by perpetually photographing her single-woman household, as if that is sustainable long term.

Despite the above rant, I know plenty of women who have died alone in their reasonably clean houses and who did not perish in catastrophic poverty or abject loneliness. I myself will probably die that way unless I manage to pop off before my husband. Fear mongering around those women who will die as lonely cat ladies is highly exaggerated, though it has been known to happen. I fear for the middle aged women currently driven to homelessness who live out of vans like the movie Nomadland, where Frances McDormand plays a widow who has no choice but to take up van life. At some point, we become feeble in mind and body, and the part of Nomadland we never see is how McDormand's character dies. Is she taken in by her few remaining relatives or friends? Does she park the dying van near a large wilderness area and then wander off into the trees to allow nature to do its work?

Are men lonely enough?

Women are not as afraid to die alone as men, that is for sure. They marry and re-marry. If they are single, unlike women, they would rather be paired off.

There is one particular dude bro influencer who shall remain nameless who often posts about the detestable characteristics of females/femoids. He is apparently married to a woman and has at least 5 children. The men who swarm his comment sections are mostly older and married. The middle aged ones are tired of their wives, and with good cause. Their wives are nags who live to complain that their men can do nothing right. Not that the wives are doing any better in their husband's eyes: they overlook the fact their wives are, were, and remain the mothers of their children. My decision to marry a poor man who truly didn't want kids is continually validated by these men's endless posturing that it is OK to dump their wives with the other trash for not wanting sex at age 54 with a balding, grumpy, pot-bellied, lazy, perpetually angry 58 year old. The solution is to replace the aging, used-up harridan with a younger model, preferably about 15 years his junior so that way the adult children won't be as freaked out by the pedophile aspect of their father's remarriage.

In one of his comment sections, Married with Children Dude Bro observes that he finds it interesting that prostitutes, E-girls, and other forms of women he views as trophies can find it in themselves to service men when they are not in the mood, but wives (especially those of middle age) cannot suck it up, either metaphorically or literally. He then suggests that because she isn't in the mood that her man decides not to be in the mood to pay her bills.

There is a sort of man who will always see his wife as the Queen of All Whores who beat out the other contenders to be the mother of his primary children (he likely has other, less legitimate sets of kids elsewhere). He frames himself as an alpha and is the dictator of his own banana republic. He often has a background in video game design or engineering or both, and he ardently believes that he and everyone else construct their own fates and that there is no such thing as chance, which is rather Calvinist of him. He supports that which helps solidify his delusion that other people, including his own wives and children, are to be used and shat upon for the glory of his ego and solipsism. She is an old sow who was once a young heifer and will always be reduced as a depreciating asset.

We are in a dark pit of Meatworld at the bottom of the Kali Yuga -- luckily there is nowhere to go from here but up! -- and that is why this sort of man does reasonably well in the modern day milieu. He has the sort of retarded, left-brained thinking that makes him think he can avoid the consequences of his actions forever, and that is why he is serenely unconcerned about unearned wealth or being treated as he has treated others.

Women who marry this sort are to be profoundly pitied. She naively believes the hype and enjoys the trappings of material success he is able to provide, and before you know it, she is moored to him and his abuse via their children. He does not grow fonder of her as she ages. When she is middle aged, she had better be nearly as svelte, hot, healthy, obedient, and ready as she was before the umpteen children, or he will replace her with a new Queen of Whores that he has determined will yield better dividends than the current model. She will be cast out of the home she foolishly made, and he will pride himself on the pre-nup that allows him to escape paying for her not to fall into a lower class that she may or may not survive. Naturally, she will be full of hatred, vitriol, and bitterness, and he will never once look in the mirror and own up to having helped make her that way.

For the love of the game

Patriarchy treats all as a game, and we are about 10,000 years into patriarchy as is evidenced by data centers being installed with zero thought towards potable water and a functioning electrical grid and wars that promise to rage until the last child on "their" side is melted down into a puddle of formerly-human grease. Patriarchy seeks to game-ify everything from commerce to intimate love, forcing us all to participate in contests until we collapse in exhaustion and the ecosystem along with us.

In our long standing patriarchal systems, all men are either pimps or simps. All women are whores. Even babies are not exempt from the gruesome reality of human trafficking. Women, like animals, are to be controlled, bought, and sold. A woman's worth is therefore determined by her youth, and it goes away as soon as she no longer is desirable or wants to have sex. The game is far more beloved than any human being outside the self.

For men, the goal is to make manhood a big competition where, like the old Highlander movies, THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE, and the Alpha King will rule his feudal empire until one of his sons takes his place. A man's worth is determined by the size of his penis, his harem, and the delusion that his inflated ego makes him intelligent.

We can hardly wonder with women and men in such a state that nobody in their right mind wants to take a chance on marriage. Women think they're winning the game by being the fairest of them all and scoring a good provider until their looks and sex drive fade and the good provider turns out to be a shallow egomaniac who has never considered them to be human. Men think they're losing the game because the self-appointed Alphas tell them they don't have what it takes to win. Meanwhile, there are plenty who would seek a third and better way, and that is where I come in.

Even if I get divorced tomorrow, I have been married to the same man for 26 years. It is excruciatingly obvious that I did not marry for money. Despite all our troubles and the fact I am the primary breadwinner of my household, my husband and I have a good marriage, and that is why I feel I am at liberty to give some advice for choosing and staying with a mate long term.

1. Stop keeping score

If you read nothing else in this article, read and re-read this first point. Score-keeping is what happens when you game-ify all your relationships (this advice can easily be applied beyond the realm of your mate) and think that you are somehow owed because of the good deeds you did and can somehow escape all the bad deeds you've done. Score-keeping is misery. You did the dishes, so she owes you sex. You changed the baby's diapers, so he owes you a foot rub. You pay the mortgage, so she owes you a clean house. You look good at 40, therefore you can easily leave and snag a richer man than him. And so on. Score-keeping is a fixation upon the negative and a discounting of the positive. It also turns all women into chattel and all men into whoremongers or would-be whoremongers. The solution is to focus on the good the other has done instead of where they do not measure up in portfolio or cup size. Instead of getting mad he hasn't mowed the lawn, smother it with cardboard and mulch for a pollinator garden and be grateful he helps with the yard and maintains the air conditioner. Instead of being mad that she no longer puts out, thank her for all the housework she does without thinking about it and hug your precious kids.

2. Know your real limits

There are deal-breakers in relationships, and if someone is genuinely preventing you from who you ought to be, you do need to leave. More often than not, however, it is a matter of not feeling brave enough to strike out on your own. In my younger years, I was afraid to put my foot down with my husband where our finances were concerned. Only as an older, more confident woman was I able to say "My way or the high way", and that is why we no longer live with my parents and we do reside in our own modest home. This home, though it ain't much, would be easily pissed away if we were still chasing unearned wealth via speculation and risk-taking. If you are the one maintaining the scaffolding and sanity of your marriage, stand your ground. For me, unearned-wealth chasing and cheating are marriage deal-breakers. My aunt had to deal with a gambler and she rightfully divorced him. Others I know had to deal with cheaters and some are still together, some are not. Aside from the true deal-breakers, I can make the best out of the pitfalls that come.

3. Ask yourself "Who benefits?" from your separation and divorce.

We all know that weddings are a racket, but did you ever consider who is making money off divorces? When two people shack up, they do so because "two can live as cheaply as one". Traditionally, large families used to live in one multigenerational house or compound, which offered safety in numbers as well as in-family wealth transfer as the home was passed from parents to children. Atomization is monetization, and not for the families themselves, but for the array of parasites that feed off of the assets and loosh released by broken homes and broken hearts. Maybe, just maybe, we are all being groomed all the time to see marriage vows as temporary and for our convenience. It's also useful when we see each other as pimps, simps, and hoes and use transactional thinking to game-ify our connections with each other, as if they were not priceless.

4. Defeat anxiety with gratitude and score-keeping with generosity.

Gratitude is the only force powerful enough to battle the Wendigos of our demonic age and win, and generosity is a function of gratitude. The kind of anxiety that ends marriages is not only annoying, it is rooted in fear. Anyone who genuinely believes in God or gods should in theory be able to dismiss fear and with it, anxiety, including anxiety created by one's mate for not living up to an ideal. Clearly there are plenty of people who say they believe in God without meaning it. One way we can put more belief in the Divine, even if that divinity is only the best and noblest aspects of ourselves, is to counter each anxious thought with 3 grateful ones. Going nuts over the crappy looking porch steps? Counter it with gratitude for having a porch and not dodging bombs and drones. Be grateful for clean water to drink and the sun on a beautiful day. Yes, the porch issue was not solved, but you put your thinking brain towards things that are actually important instead of whatever rat race the material world insisted you run. Gratitude, as I have said many times, has that weird trait of sublimating whatever it touches by the power of seven or more and radiates exponentially and fractally from its source. Harness the power of gratitude and you'll improve your marriage and every other blessed thing in your life.


(will be screened)
(will be screened)
(will be screened)
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting

Profile

kimberlysteele: (Default)
Kimberly Steele

April 2026

S M T W T F S
   1234
5 6789 1011
121314 151617 18
19202122232425
2627282930  

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Apr. 21st, 2026 04:40 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios